Phase 4 and On...

Here I am, 15 days after my surgery. My drain was removed yesterday, I got my first fill on my expander, and today I had my first oncology appointment. 

Now I am moving on to phase four of my cancer path. (at least according to this chart)

Screening and biopsy...done Sept.-Oct.

Diagnosis...done Nov.

Surgery...done Feb.

Treatment...starting Mar.

In two weeks, I will start treatment with Letrozole to block my body from making Estrogen. Apparently, that is what those little cancer cells feed on, so we want to starve them.

Prior to that, I will see my plastic surgeon again to add more fill to the expander in preparation for reconstruction with an implant. I will see my breast surgeon to confirm everything under her purview is progressing as planned. And, I will have a bone density test.

My Oncologist informs me that 50% of his patients do fine on this medication with no side effects. Of the remaining group, 30% will have manageable side effects, and 20% will have severe ones. I'm hoping to make the first team of 50 percenters. With the medication, my odds of recurrence are about 5%; without, it is about 10%.

After getting established with the hormone therapy, I will probably have reconstructive surgery in late April, early May. Hopefully to be healed before our planned cruise to Alaska with my mom. If the surgery can't happen at least three weeks before our trip, then it will happen in late June.

I am still praising God for His care and love for me. I have had very little pain and no signs of complications. I feel good and need to hold myself back from overdoing. As far as breast cancers go, I feel I got the "Breast Cancer Lite" version. It is still an ugly little beast, but I have a beautifully big God.

Happy Dance Time!

If I was not so tired, I would be doing a happy dance right now. I'll just have to settle for this little koala, mouse, bear, whatever-it-is to do it for me. Bottom line, my pathology report just came in and my lymph node is NEGATIVE for any malignancies! GOD IS GOOD!

There was an additional IDC spot near the first one that was originally biopsied. So, there were two invasive cancer spots and one non-invasive. All the margins were clear and there is no evidence of additional cancer.

I am so grateful for all of the prayers and support I have received. Like I already said, I'm tired, so that is all for now. Time for a nap. 

24 Hours Later

At the time I write this, it's Valentines Day at 11 am. Just 24 hours ago I was in recovery after my single mastectomy. The day started early at 5:30 as we got up and got ready to go to the hospital. My bag was packed the night before with the few things I would need for my overnight stay. Steve drove me to the hospital in a light snow flurry and we arrived at my appointed check-in time of 6:30. 

Within minutes, I was taken back to the pre-op area. My breast surgeon came in and initialed my breast and went over the procedure. She then asked if it was okay if she prayed for me. Of course! I am blessed to have a surgeon that is not only highly respected in her field, but also a Christian. By 7:30 I was all prepped and my mom showed up to wait with me and Steve. I got my radioactive isotope injection and my plastic surgeon came by to draw all over me. I felt like an art project. Then my favorite person showed up, the anesthesiologist! I love the man that keeps me totally unaware of what the surgeons are doing to me. 

Soon I was whisked away for my 8:30 surgery. I was told it would take 2-3 hours. They started the happy juice and I was out. I woke up at 11 am in recovery feeling pretty good, but a little groggy. By noon I was in my room. 

The surgery only took 90 minutes. Unfortunately, the volunteer that was sent to get my husband from the hospital cafeteria was not the best at communicating. She just told him he needed to hurry back to the surgical waiting area to talk to the doctor. Poor guy thought something had gone wrong early in the surgery and had a few minutes of panic. The surgeon was quick to reassure him that everything was fine and he could go to my room soon and see me.

The pain level was quite tolerable. The only problem was a queasy headache from the anesthesia. I was able to eat a piece of toast and some broth. There was some nausea later, but not too bad. However, around 5 pm, I got quite sick. Apparently that was what my body needed because I was able to eat a small dinner after that, and keep it down.

I had the typical mostly sleepless night that you get in the hospital. Though Steve said he had his best sleep in weeks. Probably due to the reduced stress of waiting for this surgery. By 7 am, my surgeon came in, looked me over, and said "go home." Steve was there to pick me up by 9, and now I am home, with my husband and mother trying to get me to rest and behave myself. 

The nurses and all the staff were amazing. Two of them at the shift change thanked me for having, "such a great demeanor." I was grateful to keep up my testimony during the grogginess, nausea, and pain adjustment. Though I was only able to have one faith conversation, I played some Christian music on my phone that the nurses could hear when they came in.

Overall, everything went better than anticipated. Now to just wait for the lymph node biopsy results. God has been good. I look forward to seeing how He will continue to bless in this challenge.

3, 2, 1 Cancer Eviction Time!

Just three more days until my single mastectomy. It just doesn't seem possible that it is so close. It feels like forever since the first hint of something not right in my left breast this past August. Even the diagnosis in November seems so long ago. But here it is, just around the corner.

I have mixed feelings about the surgery. Relief that something is finally happening. Sadness at the loss of part of my body and the scarring to come. Hope that the cancer will not be in my lymph nodes and that the reconstruction will look okay. Concern about the pain of recovery and the effects of the hormone therapy that will come later. 

But mostly I feel gratitude. Gratitude that God has provided in so many ways over the past six months. Gratitude that the times of "Oh God, I'm scared, please don't let this happen!" are few and short-lived. Gratitude for a loving husband who sees beauty in me in so many more ways than my body. Gratitude for all the love and support I have received from family, church, friends, strangers.

Two groups of strangers in particular have given me so much encouragement. Members of Christian Healthcare Ministries and the owners and customers of EmbraceYourStyleNails.com. I have received about 30 cards and emails from the members of CHM telling me of their prayer support, even though I dropped their coverage last year when my other insurance came through. And, when one of the owners of EYSN posted my cancer diagnosis, more than 55 customers responded with messages of support. What a blessing!

No, I don't want cancer. I don't want surgery. I was okay with my 63 year old breasts that were no longer perky, so I don't want them changed. I don't want someone messing with my hormones. I don't want to be hyper aware of every new thing my body does from now on and have to check to see if there is a new cancer. I don't want to see the worry in my loved ones faces when they think about what is in store for me. 

But it is all happening. And, strangely, I am still at peace with it. I truly feel the "peace of God, which surpasses all understanding" that God promises to those who trust Him. He is faithfully guarding my heart and mind.

Get Me OFF of this Roller Coaster!

I hate roller coasters! They give me a headache and make me sick, literally!

For 27 hours, since 9am yesterday, I was on the insurance vs medical provider roller coaster. 

Every piece of information I received contradicted the previous one. Every time I thought I had an answer, the answer changed.

You are covered.

You are probably not covered.

You should be okay, maybe.

You are not covered.

You are covered, but our administrative office will not authorize your insurance.

Until, finally...We have written authorization to accept your insurance. You ARE covered!

Not only was my peace wagon upset, I was almost dizzy from all of the constantly changing information coming my way. I was struggling to keep trusting. My husband asked if I was having trouble believing God could take care of this. I still believed God was in control, but I was having trouble keeping my trust focused on Him. I felt like the father in the Bible that cried out to Jesus, "I believe, help my unbelief!"

My roller coaster ride is over, for now, and I am back on solid ground. Everything is back on track to do the surgery on February 13 in Prescott Valley. I don't have to change doctors or hospitals. I don't have to travel 100 miles for surgery.

There will be other bumps in the road ahead that may shake me up a bit, but God continues to prove He is bigger than any obstacles along the way. I just need to remember that when I feel the need to cry out, "I believe, help my unbelief!"